Murphy's laws on computers

Murphy's computer laws are based on experience and observations. They all derive from the original Murphys's law "everything that can go wrong will go wrong".

- Constants aren't
- If a program is useful, it will have to be changed.
- If a program is useless, it will have to be documented.
- Every non trivial program has at least one bug
- Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.
- A patch is a piece of software which replaces old bugs with new bugs.
- Failure is not an option, it's included with the software.
- If you're in a hurry, your computer will crash, a hard drive will become corrupted, or your files will be erased. Any way, you're screwed if you have a deadline.
- There is an inverse relationship between an organization's hierarchy and its understanding of computers.
- The probability of a hardware failure disappearing is inversely proportional to the distance between the computer and the customer engineer.
- A working program is one that has only unobserved bugs.
- Disks are always full. It is futile to try to get more disk space. Data expands to fill any void.
- No matter how hard you work, your boss will only appear when you access the Internet.

Category: Jokes

0 December 17, 2011

Related ...

The Murphy's laws about work :

- The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
- Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
- Everything can...

The top 20 of all the Murphy's laws. They all derive from the original law of Murphy:

0. Everything that can go wrong will.

In no particular order, here are the top 20 most important laws of Murphy:

1 - Almost anything is easier to get into than out of.

2 - Anybody can win -- unless there happens to be a second entry.

3 - No matter which direction you start it's always against the wind coming
back.(No matter which way you ride, it's uphill and against the wind.)

4 - Any order that can be misunderstood has been misunderstood...

Pessimistic and funny Murphy's laws on love :

- All the good ones are taken.
- If the person isn't taken, there's a reason.
- If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.
- Nothing improves with age.
- Sex takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble.
- It is always the wrong time of month.
- It's always easier to get a partner if you already have one.
- If you're having difficulties choosing between potential two girls, you'll always pick the wrong one.
- If you love her/him, s/he doesn't love you...